What gives me hope is that I know something incredible is coming.

That despite this spell, I can feel it in my bones.

What does that even mean?

I will never achieve what I want, because I won't allow myself to. Silly story. I could move to Paris and wallow with the French for a living. I'd be rich.

I'm striving for something steady, but then what? What will I do with my nice things, genuine relationships, and free time? Exist?

Exist.

I'm falling again.